Beth

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My heart is so heavy right now I feel as if I can’t breathe. My dear friend Beth lost her battle with sarcoma tonight after fighting for three long years. She was the only person in my life who understood exactly what I was feeling and could truly identify with what I was going through. I met her at the cancer hospital just after starting treatments last year. She came into my room like a ray of sunshine. She was so open with me about her personal struggle and so reassuring that I would be fine. She was always trying to help me with her wisdom and always thought of my well-being, even when she was in pain or suffering. I remember one of the first pieces of advice she gave me was that I should wrap a towel around my crutch to make it more comfortable to use. Whenever she was at the hospital, she and her wonderful husband would come visit with me. Everyone at the center knew her and loved her. She was like the most popular girl at school and she took me under her wing and made me feel at home in a place rife with fear and uncertainty.

After I was done with treatment last year we stayed in touch. Even though she was so sick, she was always so positive. Her strength was truly something to be marveled at. Her words of encouragement kept me going and they touched me in ways no one else could. Because she understood. She just knew.

When I found out she may be dying, I was devastated. I didn’t want to believe that it was true. It made me want to set fire to the world. Of all people, why her? She was such a selfless, caring woman with a good heart. Surely she didn’t deserve to go out like this. It makes me so mad I want to put my fist through a wall. It just doesn’t make any sense. It simply isn’t fair. 

She was such a beautiful soul and I’m certain that she touched the hearts and lives of many, not just my own. I hope she knew how much her friendship meant to me and how much I loved her and valued her guidance. From this day forward, my fight is her fight. Everything I do to beat this thing will be with Beth in my heart and on my mind. I pray that my victory can be hers. May she finally rest in peace.  

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